Missing Mom

A tough day in the Estes world…6 years ago today we lost my mom.  It’s hard to believe it’s been that long already.  I wish more than I can say that she were here to see us all today - Dave and I with our three amazing boys, living in Switzerland; and Emily married with two beautiful daughters.  Our lives have changed so much in the last 6 years, and yet every day I hear her in the conversations I have with my boys, in the funny little “mom-isms” I can’t help but use too, and in my thoughts as I wind my way through the labyrinth that is motherhood.  She taught me everything I know about how to be a mother…I just wish she was here to see it all come to fruition.  Mom, I love you so much and miss you every single day.  I know you’re keeping an eye on us and keeping this"mommy train" on the tracks…thank you!

I posted this last year to Facebook, but am going to post it here again today since it reminds me of my mom every time I hear it.  These are the lyrics to the song “Always Remember” by Train.

"Always Remember"

Train

Always remember I'm by your side
Such a shame that you had to go
So much more that I'd like to know
So many things you forgot to show me how to do

When times are hard I forget your gone
I go to call you before it dawns on me
That you wont be there now
But I still have these words that you gave me

Always remember I'm by your side
Always remember I'm by your side

I got two kids of my own now
They grow up so fast
And how I wish you did not miss that part of who I am
But I keep doing all that I can do
And I will smile when they ask about you
And I will sing to them every day 
With voice and the words that you used to say
Will change the world one day

Always remember I'm by your side
Always remember I'm by your side

And while they grow up you will show up
In things they do and say
Like a reflection to a connection 
Of who they'll be one day
They will learn to get their wings 
And fly through the changes life will bring
So on 
And it will go on
And you will go on

And they will sing with the voice that you gave them
Always remember I'm by your side
Always remember I'm by your side
I'm by your side
I'm by your side